you both once said "you're a friend whom i won't forget", "you're a friend i need the most" etc. But your actions speaks like wise. And i wasn't pissed off, i was simply just upset beyond repair. I didn't want to think that you don't bother, but your actions were not lies. Am my existence really irreplaceable? Think about who actually helped you during your times of difficulties and though, i only speak words to you without any actions, anyone who knows me will know that i'm sincere about such things and you are no exception. It's okay to entertain other friends when i'm talking to you, but you were there having fun and all while i was here, trying to help you. I'm not like the old Bernie, clinging onto things desperately. i still cling onto things but not desperately. I decided to brush it off after a day's thinking but you won't regret losing a friend like me right? Since you will meet more "bernie-alike" people right? Trust me, i might say to you like i said to others "i will fight for you" but if you're all that unappreciative, then i will give up on you. I will only fight for those who appreciates what i've done for them sincerely and they're the ones who makes a difference in my life. For now, you both are still dear to me and i'm just going to watch how you're gonna behave. Mark her words; when Bernie says she gives up on you it means she will give up to the end, leaving no traces behind.

and you, stubborn old man at home. Because of you, i've to hold back the things that i would love to do, again. You don't even spare a thought for me. I love makeup and it's a path that i would love to expand on. Now, thanks to you, the money i save up is to repay back for your debts, not for the things that i would like to invest on. Give me a break, will you? besides your whole shit attitude i have to face at home, i have got assignments and household chores to help which you, selfish old man, isn't willing to help. All you care about is did your precious fishes died, why is the fish tank light not working, checking out the lastest news about fishes on forums and all those most crappiest things ever in life. I mean, come on. Fishes? The kind of pets that needs like tons of electricity 24/7, and when the bill goes high, you said i use my laptop for too long. Then you say all i know is to shop and entertain myself, without helping out in the family. OH.MY.GOD. -bimbo tone- i can't even be bother to argue back with you, stubborn old man.

I'm learning to control and not throw my anger around either, especially at people who aren't involved. Cry it out, then, move on in life because no one is going to be happy for myself except myself.